March 23, 2023

Watch Out for Dream Killers

When I was about to become an EOS implementer, I wanted to shout my exciting plan from the rooftops. I got such passion and fulfillment from this new vision for my future and I wanted to share it with the community around me. I don’t think I had ever felt more seen or uplifted than when my support system stood behind my dream, offered guidance, and volunteered to be my sounding board.

Their positive reactions breathed life into my pursuits and compelled me to move forward with confidence. Whether they were offering constructive feedback, cheering me on, or simply listening, their encouragement meant everything and, quite frankly,  set me up for success early in my EOS career.

Dreams are an invaluable part of a joy-filled life – they drive us to reach our goals, serve as a guiding light, foster abundance and fulfillment, and encourage us to imagine possibilities. I consider the development of my EOS dream the point at which all the puzzle pieces of my life started coming together to form a complete picture.

The other thing to keep in mind with dreams is that they need to be nurtured and protected in the right environment (much like a plant!). It goes without saying that something so precious should receive maximum care to give it the best opportunity to grow. And while we may be able to control how much time and energy we invest in our dreams, sometimes the environment can be treacherous.

While the majority of my network fully supported my dream, there were some naysayers who expressed more negative viewpoints. I would hear phrases like, “but, how can you do this while you run your own company?” or, “why would you want to start over now?” Whereas the supportive reactions helped my dream flourish, the unfavorable feedback produced self-doubt, which felt a little like a weed killer sprayed on my dream garden – a dream killer if you will.

When this self-doubt seeped into my mind, I had to actively decide to tune it out and shield my dream from negative thoughts. It might have been easier to give up on working so hard and simply collect a paycheck from my company, but then I would have given into a limiting environment, ultimately missing out on an opportunity that brought me purpose and joy.

In my soon-to-be-released book, Your Life is Not a To-Do List: Tools for a More Joyful Entrepreneurial Journey, I explore the idea of how those you surround yourself with affect your environment, self-image, and even the outcome of your dreams. One of my favorite tools from the manuscript relates to Darren Hardy’s perspective on “The Compound Effect” He says that “[the people you habitually associate with] determine 95 percent of your success or failure in life.”

In understanding that the 5-10 people you closely interact with have such a tremendous impact on you, I’m sharing a sneak peek of one of my favorite tools below. Read on for how you can create an environment that helps your dreams blossom.

Five Steps to Ward off Dream Killers

Step 1: Take Stock

Start by taking a blank sheet of paper and writing down all the people you spend time with (make sure you include family here too!). Next, write down the traits you admire about each person and then the traits that you find challenging. Keep in mind that just because you find a trait to be difficult, doesn’t mean that it’s a negative. For example, some find loud voices burdensome while others admire those who speak with some gusto. Be honest and keep it personal to you.

Step 2: Create a Wish List

Next, make a list of all of the traits that are most beneficial to you during this time in your life. If you are on the verge of trying something new, starting your own business or taking on a new project, think ahead and jot down the features that allow for the best chance at success.

Step 3: Find the Matches

Read through both lists and match up the traits you need with the people who already have similar or exact-match traits. Think of it like interviewing for a position, or drafting players to be on your team. You will want to find those that will make a great fit, all things considered.

Step 4: Create Your Circle

In the corner of your paper, draw an arc and fill it with the names of your 5-10 picks. These people will be your circle of influencers during this time. You just effectively identified them as a match and now you can mentally invite them to be on your dream team!

Step 5: Guard Your Circle

Philosophy Ph.D. Maarten van Dorn authored a well-known article titled, “You are the Average of the Five People you Spend the Most Time With.” The title alone contains food for thought, but beyond that, the article discusses the importance of being an active participant in creating your environment. Instead of leaving the company you keep to convenience or chance, build and invest in the relationships that inspire you, push you, and encourage you to realize your dreams.


Let’s Get Your Company Running on EOS

To include me in your circle of influencers, book a discovery call so we can work on growing your dreams and helping them thrive.  Together, we’ll use the EOS framework to create a supportive community and circle of supporters who will push and encourage you!



I invite you on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth, into ever-increasing authenticity and self-love.

I created my personal Map of Me to help guide my decisions from a place of strength. My Map of Me has awakened me to who I really am, and who I want to be. It allows me to live from my design at my highest and best, as well as plan to shore up the weaknesses—and it’s given me the ability to see and appreciate the differences. I believe that all individuals should be authentic, open and able to express themselves fully with confidence—your Map of Me is your guide for
doing just that.

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